As it has seemingly been my norm, I arrived home a little late that evening and Amy was right there, serving dinner. With guilt, I held her hand and whispered right into her ears.
“I’ve got something to tell you,” I said.
She sat down and quietly, started devouring her dinner. I could read remorse and concern in her eyes.
Having fallen madly in love with my co-worker named Jane, my 10-year old marriage with Amy was certainly on the line. I couldn’t afford to open my mouth and let her know that I wanted a divorce. However, upon hearing the heartbreaking words, Amy didn’t move a bit.
“Why?” she asked.
I ducked the question and kept my mouth shut. She was visibly agitated before a stream of tears started flowing down her cheeks. Obviously, she had no idea what had befallen our marriage, but I cared less. She kept crying in bed and it was quite a task convincing myself that my decade-old marriage would be over, all because of Jane.
I prepared a divorce agreement that entitled her to our house, our car, and 30% stake in my company. She tore it, but I knew I wasn’t retracting my decision anymore. I was in love with someone who worked in my business, and clearly, my feelings towards her were all, but over.
She loudly cried in front of me, what I had been expecting for some time. My pursuit of divorce had finally sunk deep into her heart, and I knew nothing would stop it.
As it has become a norm, I arrived late the next day and found her drafting something. I had an enjoyable day with Jane and I was physically tired. After a few hours of sleep, I got up and still, Amy was busy writing. I didn’t dare initiate a conversation, and I resumed my sleep.
Truth be told, I cared no more.
In the morning, her divorce conditions were right on the table, and surprisingly, she wanted nothing. All she wanted were a 30-day period of living as normal as possible for the sake of our little kid.
Our son was sitting his examinations in a month’s time, and she didn’t want to distort his thoughts during the exam period. Of course, it was a genuine reason and gave it.
She had another request.
“Do you remember our wedding day? How you carried me into our bridal room that night?” She asked.
She wanted a repeat, but instead of carrying her into our bedroom, I would be taking her from our bedroom to the front door. It was crazy to carry her every morning, but since she wanted to make everything smooth, I saw no harm doing it.
As expected, Jane laughed the requests off, terming them absurd. Jane even assured me that Amy would have to face divorce, no matter her tactics.
We hadn’t had any physical contact since that fateful night, and my first ordeal was both clumsy and awkward. Clapping right behind us was our little son. He was visibly elated that I was holding her mom. Poor little boy!
“Don’t tell our son about the divorce,” she whispered.
The following day of carrying her, we were a bit relaxed and as she leaned on my chest, the romantic fragrance of her perfume somewhat blew me off. Indeed I hadn’t taken some time to study my wife. Wrinkles and some growing gray hair, made me think about my actions.
By the fourth day, a rare form of intimacy was beckoning. Imagine someone I had spent the last ten years together and helped me raise our little boy?
By the sixth day, I knew I still loved her, but I didn’t let anyone know about my changing feelings. Carrying her looked simple, maybe the workouts were building my muscle power. Who knows?
I will never forget that day in the morning when Amy was struggling with what to wear. We were getting ready for work, but as a result of the divorce, she had lost a few pounds and therefore, no dress was perfect for her.
Suddenly, it dawned on me. Amy was growing thinner, making it easier for me to carry her!
A few moments later, and our son is in our room.
“Dad, it’s time to carry Mom to the door,” he said.
To him, carrying mom was an essential part of our lifestyle. She hugged him tightly, prompting the shame and guilt in me to turn my head and look elsewhere.
I lifted her as she tightly wrapped her hands around my neck. For once, her soft, natural and tender hug made me recall my feeling on our wedding day.
On the 30th day, I could hardly move a step. I was sad, but remorseful as I held her tightly. I figured out that the intimacy in our relationship had died.
Upon arriving at my workplace, I went to Jane’s office, opened her door and admitted that I wouldn’t be divorcing my beloved Amy anymore. I told her that there was no way that I would be divorcing someone I loved.
Immediately, I left her office, drove to the flower shop and purchased Amy a bouquet of flowers. With the flowers was a card that promised that I would be carrying her every day till death do us part.
I arrived in the evening, energized, wearing a smile and clutching onto my bouquet. I run upstairs, eager to renew my love for her.
Alas! Amy was lying there, dead!
She had been battling CANCER, and I was busy with Jane. She knew that her days were over, that’s why she made an outstanding request. She ensured that our son sees me a loving, caring dad. Too bad she was finally gone!
If you are married, and your relationship is headed for the rocks, this piece is for you. It isn’t too late to make the amendments and return on track.